Moved to tears.
The first song I heard this morning (in the car on my way to work) got into my heart pretty quick. Sometimes the music is more background sound as my thoughts take center stage (and sometimes the music is the Ricky Smiley Morning Show).
Sometimes I get to have an all encompassing worship session (or a fantastic voyage on the jam pony express).
Today I had a moment of Truth. A word from my Father. Something.
It was from above.
And then the tears. My heart was so warm and I felt such understanding, compassion and encouragement all at once. I felt the presence of my brother very strong in my entire being.
I’ve already cried twice more today just – by the emotion of it.
You want to hear the song?
Because I want to share it.
(I like this version with lyrics, the original video here).
Cause if you never leave home, never let go
You’ll never make it to the great unknown
So tell me you’re strong, tell me you see
So show me your fire, show me your heart
You know I’ll never let you fall apart if you
Keep your eyes open, my love
This song is where I’m at. (If you want to know where I am.)
How am I? I am.
I am striving to get to the place I belong, the place that reflects the totality of my being. Away from the shrouds and darkness and traps and chains of disordered eating. incomprehensible demoralization. Unrelenting disappointment* and hope deferred* while I wait for a tomorrow that never comes.
The time is today. Everyday. The time is now. Every moment.
Keep your eyes open.
PS- I’m going to be be writing again! I’m gonna get warmed up and then next week it is on!