Epiphany

 

I’m flattered when people wonder after me when I don’t blog, especially since most of us are all best friends on the Facebook where I continuously litter the news feed with crass modern hip-hop, peanut butter & jelly, and the occasional enlightening or funny meme.

You know, just my typical ridiculousness overflowing on the interwebs.

Who’s bad?

Anyways, in summary I am alive and well (and BAD) thanks for asking. 
I’m still on holiday, though. My blog is too.

I celebrate the Christmas season until January 6, the day of Epiphany. 

The Epiphany celebrates the manifestation of Christ into flesh and his baptism.

In my words: it’s when we think about how lucky we are to have an accessible god both WITH us and WITHIN us. A God we can talk to without fancy lingo or even words at all….A God that understands our human nature and temptations.

 

A God that hipster youth-group kids can call their “homeboy” via ironic ringer tees. (That was a joke and I am hilariously irreverent).

It also means I get to have twinkly lights up 12 days after Christmas.

Twinkly lights make everything better. Everything.

Even ugly food.

I say keep the Twinkly lights, decorations and pretty bows around a while longer….little reminders of how lucky we are and loved.
 

Because we are gifted and loved by God.
Like, SO gifted ya’ll. *wink*

But I’ll be around next week.

Here is a picture because I like to look people in the eye when I talk to them.

Also there is almost no visible bra strap in that one and I wanted to show off.

Not trying to flaunt my “no visible eyebrows” in the picture, however but vanity and shame are not activities I excel in.
Obviously.

• When do you officially snap out of Holiday mode? Decorations up till when?
  I think it’s borderline tacky to stick it out till the 6th so they FOSHO come down quick afterward. But that’s just me.

  Oh…I found this and think it’s hilarious.

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Flat Out Eggz

I’ve been eating lots of eggs lately – or eggz, rather. Since my “eggs” come from a carton most of the time,  I refer to them as eggz. Because.

I’ve been hooked on eating them a way I call flat-out. I think I may have invented it but probably not.

I received questions about it when I showed then told about my pickle and PeaBee “Pizza” thing. Thing. *giggle*

I eat “things.”

Here’s the deal behind the egg part of that thing.

I fill a Pam sprayed 9” cake pan (or two) with 1 cup of eggz. Preset oven to 450…bake for 20 minutes…flip for a few more and boom. 

You can continue to bake to get a firmer, crispier, chewier* flat. You can also play around with the amount of eggs and cooking times.

*Rubberier? I make no claims for my peculiar taste preferences so if you try this and hate it …*shrug* then I don’t know what. lol.

I put them on a rack to cool. I do not know why I do this. It’s optional.  Sometimes I cut them into quarters and halves.

Sometimes I cut them in small squares or strips…

Sometimes I leave them full and make pizzas or fold some beans and stuff things inside and eat like a soft taco…

And sometimes…

Don’t tell me you didn’t see that coming.

 

It’s like a PBJ sandwich except one thing…it’s totally NOT like a PBJ sandwich. Nor a tortilla wrap, nor a pizza crust.

It just is what it is.

Flat Out Eggz.

I like them things.

I eat things.

****Aside:

I just thought to google this before I hit publish (because this still hasn’t gotten old for me) and look what I found…

This blog writes itself.

• So let’s “talk” … what are your HONEST thoughts about my flat out eggz.
• How do you like your eggs or do you eschew them?

 

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Show and Tell

Stuffs I See and Saw. Shown and Told.

Because.

Cheerwine.

Eat ALL the Ferments!!

Eat ALL the ugly foods! (0; (Asparagus, eggs, onions, disorderly amount of seasoning).

Don’t hate me because I’m Floridian.

One of my favorite vineyards. Smoothest Zin ever.

Digging up the (dusty) past.

Rollin’ with my homies. (Seriously. *winkwink*)

Sparkles, cake and my “afro puffs.”

High School Edu-ma-cation.

A doggie Thanksgiving.

Air-drying my hairs because I’ve been swimming again!

       

FYI Fellow swimmer friends: Paul Mitchell Shampoo Three. You need it.  

 

Books. 

Pickle and Peanut Butter “Pizza” on egg “crust.”

Ugly food. Ugly photography. What can I say?

Typical evening. Nashville. Vino.

Thighs.

Read this:

  Marianne Williamson “Illuminata.”

 There is a light that never goes out.

• See anything you like?
• Yes, I still have a big booty TV set. Santa please send Missy some HD love, kay?thanx.

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Show and Tell

Stuffs I See and Saw. Shown and Told.

Because.

I’m crazy like that.

Obviously.

Beach Hair

   

Love

Ham

Elixify

Fortify

(Rhymes with Horrify*)

 

Wisdom in the Waiting Room**

Prayer in the Waiting Room

SheReadsTruth.com

Join us. (If you want)

 

*Scary looking lunch = (Shroomoodles & Nori). You are welcome.

**Therapist’s waiting room. (Fugazi. Anyone? Bueller?)

• Show me something (link it) or tell me something please. I mean, if you want. Obviously.

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Maruchi Kimchi (Vegan, Gluten Free<–I’m hilarious)

My friend David (if you don’t know him click here) gave me a Korean name last year– Maruchi.

(Sounds like Ma-roo-chee).

I love it. He recently told me it means “spastic little fish.” Which is way too appropriate.

 

Check out this photograph he gave me – it’s me in fish form!

Anyways.

David turned me into a kimchi addict. (It all started here).

What is kimchi? It’s a traditional Korean dish of fermented vegetables. Fermented food does a body good. 

He ignited my kimchi spark, then taught me to fuel my own fire. He gave me photographs of how he makes kimchi (and he makes THE BEST kimchi) and many lectures about the details.

I’ve been practicing. I am pleased to present you with:

Maruchi Kimchi

First things first.  Get all your friends together:

 

• Napa Cabbage
• Korean Radish (or the longer Japanese Daikon)
• Scallion
• Garlic
• Kosher Salt (not iodized or sea salt)
• Korean Red Pepper*
• Glass Jars

* This is hard to find. David says never use crushed red pepper flakes. The first time I made Kimchi, I used cayenne which came out fine. This time David gave me some of his Korean Red Pepper. (I might have to invest, it comes in huge bags that cost $15 a pop. Kind of daunting for a single gal).

Look at the glittery little crystals. Korean pepper flakes are like none I’ve ever seen.  

Random aside: David gave the pepper to me in a mango jam jar. Who knew of such a thing?

Back to business. Halve your cabbage.

(Does that sound weird?)

 

Then halve each half.   

Cut the cores…

Give them a bath

Cut the peeled daikon and cabbage into bite size pieces.

Then place them in a large bowl (make sure it’s a large bowl) alternating layers of veggies and salt.

Based on my research and advice from David I used 1 cup of salt for a 5 lb cabbage and two large radishes.

General rule of thumb is 1/4 cup salt per lb of cabbage.

Then you let it hang out for a few hours…

Tossing occasionally

The vegetables will reduce in size drastically and release a lot of water. See it all?

Drain your veggies and give them a quick rinse.

Chop the garlic and scallions.

 

I used about 15 green onions and the equivalent of maybe three heads of garlic. (I’m not scared)

Add them to the mix with the pepper flake.

And mix it all up.

I know, I know. You’re drooling all over your keyboard huh?

No cupcakes, oatmeal or vegan dough-balls here at Beautiful Struggle. I bring you fermented cabbage and pickles and peanut butter – my own green monsters.

*David told me many Koreans have a separate fridge devoted for kimchi. Now I understand why.

Grab some glass jars (not plastic) and let your Kimchi “ripen” outside the refrigerator for at least 24 hours. You know you’ve got fermentation action when you see the tiny bubbles.

Then stick it in the fridge…the longer you wait the “riper” it will get. When I say “ripe” I’m alluding to a distinct trademark smell the Kimchi releases. Pungent, briny, garlicky..well…you just have to smell it.

Some say “yum” and some say “run!”

I say “freaky, stinky food is FUN!”

Hey, It could be worse. Most kimchi is made with fish sauce and some with salted shrimp and other seafood. I draw the line at fermented fish.

• What’s your Kimchi verdict? Be honest. Just be sure to add the “but I love you anyways” after.

• David’s reading this….you can say “Hi” if you want.

 

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Caterpillar Eats and Deets

Here are some things I’ve ate, thinks I’ve thunk, happenings that happened and random details about me. (Why the heck am I taking pictures of food and posting them on the internet? Click here <—- for the answer)

 Google say huh?

If you google “pictures of pregnant 12 year olds” and page through a few pages of images; you will find a picture of a pickle and peanut butter which will lead you to my blog.

Thank-you, WordPress, for informing me of that.

 Who googles that?

Wait. I did (fearing it may be a pic of me. Phew!) It got me thinking…

You can tell a lot by a person’s googlage. I wouldn’t want to be judged by mine.

Here are some of them I jotted down over a week or so. (Like you care)

Oh…and stuff I ate. (sorry)

• Mattie Stepanek (for spelling)
• How to make hospital corners
• Drawings + bacon frying in a pan (long story)

• Salvaging undercooked rice + steamer
• Totaled (spelling)
• Geniuses
• Crazy Love + Book

• Anthony Bourdain (spelling)
• Banana Pepper Hummus (yes, I went there. Fail.)
• Amaranth + Microwave Popcorn Cooker (didn’t work)

 

• Healing Crisis + Fasting (for a friend)
• Speedy Gonzalez + slow cousin
• prune hands after swimming + why
• Martin Luther King + Stock Market Closed (for work)
• Greek Exclamation (Opa!)

This may be the last turkey I ever eat…my sensibilities have returned. I started eating the occasional turkey after severe malnutrition. I’m in a better place nutrition wise…and kind of grossed out. I’m starting to feel like myself again! Yay!

One last Google:

• Tenth Avenue North + you are more

I googled this to hear it about a thousand times and have since purchased it after Chelsea “gifted” it to me. (Thanks Chelsea!)

I’m re-gifting: Listen!

 

Google anything interesting lately?

I’m a bit yucked by these Pillar Eats posts (and embarrassed). Yet, I’m on a mission. Documenting some of my eats helps my journey to gain a respect for food and a more balanced diet.

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Caterpillar Eats and Deets

Here are some things I’ve ate, thinks I’ve thunk, happenings that happened and random details about me.

(Why the heck am I taking pictures of food and posting them on the internet? Click here <—- for the answer)

Wanna hear a story?

Saturday I went to see Cats…so spectacular! (Thanks Mom).

Whilst getting ready I had

—>a little moment<—

I’ve let the pictures speak the thousand words, and now I’ll let my fingers do the talking. 

I pulled out my “Black Pants” (we all have them) and discovered they didn’t fit. I don’t squeeze into stuff. I just can’t. I didn’t want to spend my night in ‘Uncomfortable Pantsland.’

I felt hot, messy and bothered. 

I kinda collapsed in my closet. “What am I gonna wear?” I realized these pants don’t fit now and accepting weight gain means accepting they will never fit again.

I needed to get rid of them but… why is that so EFFING hard?

I got angry. I got determined.

I grabbed my camera and prepared to do something I’ve been avoiding for too long.

I quickly snapped ridiculous photos of myself in the mirror, threw on some leggings and headed across the street to the Goodwill drop-off. I couldn’t bring myself to trash them (they’re really nice pants!).

I admit thinking perhaps NO woman should fit into those tiny things, but every body is different…and there are some very tall 12-year olds out there. (0:

Pause: I’m NOT pregnant by the way.

I drove like a mad hatter with just my pants to donate. (The woman in the picture was also holding bags from someone else). I literally squealed up, jumped out of my car and said “please take these.”

Then I asked if I could take her picture because I was having a moment and I like to take ridiculous pictures and post them on the internet. 

Driving away…I felt SO good. Gee.Oh.Oh. Gee. You can see it in my face! I got goosebumps. It was pretty awesome, and by awesome I MEAN awesome.

For the record, I wore jeans.

And heels! (I’m not always in flip-flops)

The end.

• Thank you all for the comments left on that post and all of them. They mean …ah…so much to me. I wish I had a cool blog where I can respond and be sure you got it via email but alas…
• Throw out any “skinny clothes” lately? I have a whole lot more work to do, myself. I should probably throw out many things that still fit but that are sizes not meant for a 32 year old woman.
• Any tips/feedback on my culinary swagger or lack thereof?

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Caterpillar Eats and Deets

 

Here are some things I’ve ate, thinks I’ve thunk, happenings that happened and random details about me.

(Why the heck am I taking pictures of food and posting them on the internet? Click here <—- for the answer)

For starters.

 

I’m a protein kind of gal. When I wake up in the morning oatmeal is not in the cards.

 

I’m all about egg whites and egg beaters. And Greens!

I LOVE heaping amounts dark greenies in my brekkie. Makes me feel amazing.

Like a million (green) bucks.

 

Sometimes in Liquid Form.

And consumed on the road.

I most often eat breakfast at work, though. Attractive, huh?

Usually, I add something or other depending on what my body needs. Super hungry? I add in veggie meat. Sometimes I need more complex carbs so I may add hummus or crackers or wraps.  Mostly I add a piece of fruit.

Like an apple.

And when my body needs fat I add cream cheese

or nut butter.

 

I made that nut butter my self! *beaming with pride*

Lunch is also consumed at the office and very easy to assemble. Microwave, toaster oven & I’m good to go.

 

My dinners, sadly, need a bit more work.

I am stuck trapped in a rut. My dinners are prepared in minutes, though, and they taste good to me!

And repeat.

I do up a ton of veggies and always go back for more…but I start with what fits on a plate (0:

And I love me my random snacks.

These nuts are…dangerously good. Recipe here. They also make for some nice nut butter if you have a food processor and are up for a challenge.

Need I say more? Cheezy. Popcorn.

Phantasmic.

I use an air popper that you put in the microwave.

Much quieter than a machine.

Vocabulary Lesson

Hummus = Hummus

Yummus = Hummus made with beans other than garbanzos

Humpalsa =  Half the chick peas, mostly veggies.

Comes out like a mix between hummus, pesto, and salsa.

Pestalsa = No chickpeas or beans. Like a mix between pesto and salsa.

In the future I intend to fill the “in-between” photos with more deets and thinks.

Meanwhile…I’ll be looking for more of this:

• Do you photograph your food? Why? (cause asking why not would be too weird…lol)
• Have you found a food that really FUELS you? Like me and my greens and eggs?

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