Hey ya’ll.
So. Another week come and gone with no blogwriting-mojo but here I am now.
Just gonna flow … stream of consciousness …
Try not to drown.
One of the reasons why I enjoy to write here is because I enjoy YOU. Who is “you,” you ask? YOU. Yes you.
Your comments and friendlies and the fact that for the most part you GET me.
That being said…
Yup. Still hanging around here in meh-sville (which as I write this I am realizing is the same neighborhood as ME-sville and yes I am so all up in myself right now it’s pathetic.)
I realize to everything a season and that I must be feeling this way with reason and for purpose. But still…
Not a cool place to be.
Especially for me.
I’m usually able to find the bright side, the sunny side, the rainbows…
Or, you know…I eat my way there.
Sigh.
My cutest friendly ‘”brick house” Katie shared some great quotes the other day – one of which was:
And me – in my meh-sville/me-sville “mememe” mental mode – got personal in her comments section.
“I have a whole mental “thing” about that word. Since High School I’ve always said…
“I just don’t know how to be”
My friends would ask “how to be … what?” or “how to be ..when?”
And I’m like…
“No … I just don’t know how to just be.”
I’m always and have always been shifting and thinking and swirling …
wondering, wandering, waiting, wanting…
I long to be.
Just BE.
Breathe and God’s Presence takes me to that place every.single.time.
So, the “be” thing is amplified about eleventy gazillion percent toi the ninth power with this weight gain and body discomfort. Which – is necessary should I choose top recover.
This is always ALWAYS my breaking point and I am devoting so much energy to BE-ing in this skin.
My friend Rachel has been helping me, allowing me to share the specifics and she wrote something to me that really moved me.
And then she made it a picture for me to have.
I’m trying to learn to dance in my own skin despite the discomfort.
That’s all.
No –wait! I’m not done yet.
Peanut Butter is delicious.
Love this post. Been here. It gets better. Stay strong! Go with it.
Yes, it is. Eat some more of it.
I’m not a resident of Mehs-ville, but I’ve vacationed there off and on for years. I can tell you that is a nice place to visit every now and then (you gotta get that out, it does you no good to keep it in) but getting back to your REAL lif, your REALITY? So much better.
Also? Nice bra strap.
Breathe and stay in God’s presence my lady!
I haven’t mastered just Be quite yet but I’m gonna continue to work
Work with me!
Hugs <3
i loved that you caller her brick house! my new nick name for her. Now… lets dance. meh and all
Hehehe… May I copy paste this?…ok, steal this?..
I know.
Yes, I know.
I am as well, I “be” and lately I don’t know what the hell I’m doing in/with my blog… here!
So this is helpful!
I just “be”
I love your post and I wish I could cut and past it too. I’d love to keep and share the picture Rachel made for you – it’s profound.
)
And I hear you. I’m sorry things have been so meh. Life can be pretty darn meh, can’t it be? I’ve been having the blahs lately myself. And I relate so much to you where you said, you usually manage to see the bright side – me too. But also, when I can’t, I eat my way there. Unfortunately rainbows aren’t made of food. (Unless you mean rainbow ice cream
It is really hard to just ‘be’. It’s like we need a reason to justify why we are even alive, here on earth. It’s hard to remember that we are here on earth because we were wanted, and we were created to be us because that’s the way we are meant to be.
Thank you for such a beautiful post out of such hard times. I hope things get better for you xxx
I struggle ALL the time trying to just “be.” Whether it’s just being and enjoying the quite of the day, being and enjoying free time while not working, being and enjoying living my life for me!! I always have to go go go and if I don’t I stress. It’s a challenge I share with you. I have a giant tub of fresh ground PB in my pantry, it comes in handy
.
Dancing in your skin despite the discomfort. Sounds tough, but I know you can do it! I’m sure it takes practice and time
Mmm maybe we can just ‘let it be’ instead of ‘trying to be’?
I mean, there were four handsome men who once made those three words very famous for a reason, no?
I can relate, To BE mmm…hard, loved your post. I’m told with PRACTICE I’ll get used to BEING???
Hehe. Your posts always make me smile due to the comics and laughter component. Thank you <3
aww i never realized you used the picture i made you in ze blog! guess i’ve been a bum about blog reading