Thinks You Should Know Thursday

It’s Thursday (oh, really?) AND…..I’ve been thinking (oh. really.)

Guess what? There are some thinks I think you should know. Because.

#1.

It’s a beautiful day in my neighborhood.

Finally. Living in Florida is worth every Storm Season, but gray and soggy weather makes me feel….gray and soggy.

#2.

I think you should know what an ampersand looks like. I think you should know this will change your life.

You can’t unlearn that. You can forget it, but you can never un-know it.

#3

My “Greens, Eggs SANS Ham-cakes” are back in full effect.

(Needs a side order of calories). You should know that adding poppy seeds to ugly food ups the ugly factor by 10%.

 

#4

I think someone in my apartment complex has a crush on me. This has been outside my apartment for days now.

 

I must have a secret admirer who truly understands the nature of my soul.

And I do mean SOUL. That’s gold spray paint. Big Pimping, Baby.
Burt seriously, I NEED THIS RIDE SO BAD………..

 

My sore rib has prevented me from hopping on and taking it for a cruise but my rib feels better. It is SO on. (Yes, I will really do this and yes, I’ll return it. You get away with stuff like that when you smile pretty).

If it WERE mine, I’d pimp it out my style. Glitter. Rainbow Glitter. Disco Ball reflectors. Maybe a helmet for special occasions.

 

#5

I think you should know that while rationalizing paying $3.50 for this bag of deliciousness (and I think you should)….

Please know that there is a 70% likelihood you will eat the entire bag in one sitting (and I think you should). It’s a pricey ticket to 180 calories and 20 minutes of heaven is all. Your worth it.

 

• What do you think I should know?

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Cracker Jacked

Um….can I just share?
I’m pretty sure I have a bruised rib.

There’s no visible bruise, but it hurts right here:
  

But only when I breathe and move and stuff. Or sleep. Or wear my bra.

No biggie.

But HOW? What did I do to warrant this affliction?

THIS. THIS is what really irritates me.

On Saturday my Mother and I went to Sam’s and during the frenzy of checking out (seriously, couldn’t they add a little “landing pad” on the other side of the register?) I reached across the cart and just sort of leaned into this:

 

I say “leaned into” because literally –that’s all I did. But the pain! You’d have thought I got a running start and impaled myself on the corner of the box.

I guess my point is:

I bruised my rib on a box of crackers.

Jacked my shiz up, y’all. Who DOES that?

 

Suffice it to say, I’m-a be low key for a whiles I think. Again. Living the high life over here. Kombucha wishes and kimchi dreams…

And that’s my story.

You kind of have to be here.

• What is the weirdest injury you’ve ever achieved? I’ll pass out “I’m Special” certificates.

• Favorite Ralph quote? (PS-Don’t tell me you don’t like/know the Simpson’s. No, really. Please don’t. I try really hard not to judge and that … that’s a toughie to overlook. Keep it quiet.) 
  

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Birthday Wishes

No, you’re not seeing double. I had me a birthday recently and my Mom got me the same exact card she got me last year. Not on purpose.

A faux pas? No way. Not the way I see it. 

Twice the love.

As she said, the words inside must really mean a lot to her.

Only I can become the woman God made me to be.
Only I can change those things that weigh me down.

Though she wishes she could “fix” me … all she can do is be there with love. That is enough. All I need.

 
I didn’t have a cake (duh) or candles on my birthday…but my birthday wish is that I will grasp hold of the things she wishes she could give me more of. Wisdom, Success, Health, Happiness. That way, she wouldn’t have to wish for them anymore.

But recovery, soul work, success, inner peace…these are not built on wishes.

“That’s something that has true value only if it is earned.”

Today is my Mother’s birthday….and she deserves to make her own birthday wishes. Birthday wishes for her and her alone and not for our aching hearts. 

Then, when she blows out the candles, she can have absolute peace.

I wish….

I love you Mom. I know you love me. Thank you.

Happy Birthday. You is good. You is kind. You is important. You is beautiful.
You is loved.

By generations.

 

By all of us.

Love never dies.

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I Am How I Am

One of the most difficult questions you could ever ask me is

“How are you?”

Such a loaded question. Most often asked on auto-pilot. I’ve never known how to answer it, which is usually what I tell people when they ask. 

I used to bust out my Big Gay Al….

 

But it’s not 1997 anymore and well…it’s lost on most people. (But not “my people”… if you know what I mean. We know what’s what.)

So for the past decade or so I have resorted to simply stating..

“I am.”

 

That’s how I be.

It’s probably lost on most people. (Weirdo)

But Whatever. Totally Fine.

Because if I started to get into it….

Girl? Put away your serious. Ain’t nobody wanna see that.

…I might hit you with something like this:

(get ready to rock-&-scroll)

Is it July yet? I knew June was going to be hard, but this is just nasty.
I have been in THE funk to end all funks …. and I’m not talking George Clinton P-funk. Nope.
I’ve been breathing and being and smiling and taking each day at a time, yet I’m unable to escape the underlying stench of stankazz funk just festering inside. Yuck.

This weekend it all came to a crescendo, like a tsunami. (Does anyone say tidal wave anymore or did that go out of style too?)

The funk did what it had to do, leaving me a washed up wreck for a bit. I’m all soggy and stuff but at least the worst is over? I keep thinking all of this turmoil is part and parcel of a deeper transformation. For the better.

Now that I’m over the crest, I feel a bit more able to move onwards and upwards….get my good funk on.

Heehee.

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OMMM….

Deep Breath. Inhale….and….exhale. Ahhhhh… Ommmmm…..shanti…शान्ति Get ready for another round of OMMM- On My Mind Monday. Where the breathing is deep, but the thoughts? Not so much.

Here are some random thinks I’ve thunk this past week. In no particular order. For no particular reason. Because.

Boy Scouts Need to Step it Up a Notch

Every year the Girl Scouts come correct with a limited-time-only panacea for the masses: those dearly beloved cookies. We fawn, we drool, we flock, and we spend. We spend a lot. Girl Scouts also team up with ice cream and candy bar companies, securing a portion of America’s retail dollar too.  $Cha-ching$

Let’s be real. The “for a good cause” factor is probably responsible for …oh… 15% of all proceeds. Because really? We’re just hooked.

The Girl Scouts know profitability. They also know what sells.

Then there’s the Boy Scouts. What do they sell? Microwave freakin’ popcorn.  Usually outside a grocery store selling the same thing. Big incentive. 

They don’t even sell the pre-popped or flavored varieties anymore. No. Just popcorn. That’s it. Ends there. Seriously?

There is no “immediate gratification” or “impulse temptation” factor at all. You can’t rip into a box of popcorn kernals before you even get to your car…much less devour 1/2 the box before your home, thus necessitating a return trip tomorrow to buy more.

Dear Mr. (or Mrs.) Person-in-Charge-of-All-the-Boy-Scout-Things:

Your popcorn needs more sex appeal. 

Invest in a few tons of sugar, salt, and fat. Go to town in a test kitchen.  It doesn’t matter what comes next. All the basics are there. Layer sugar, salt and fat on anything and it’ll sell.

I personally recommend marketing a popcorn/trail mix “bar” of some sort. Disguise the fatty sugarbomb with words like “wholesome” and “nutritious” or “energy".

Make them really small and “only 200” calories. Or make the ratio of serving size to servings per bar inversely proportional. Set up shop outside of places like Curves or something. BE INVENTIVE!!

I can’t believe I’m actually promoting this kind of thing, but heck – it’s for a good cause. lol.

While I’m on the topic of delicious addictive food….

Paula Deen is Selling Diabetes.

I know Paula’s diabetes is old news….the jokes have been made, critics have weighed in, etc. Yet, only recently did it dawn on me that she is, effectually, selling Diabetes. 

I think of it like this: She profits from her show/cookbooks which are rife with uber rich foods. It’s fine in moderation, but we don’t live in a moderate society. We live in an obese society. Lots of Diabetes going on.

The way I see it, now that Paula’s Diabetes is out of the closet, her show is basically pitching “let me show you all the food to eat in abundance if you want to get diabetes.” 
$Cha-ching$

And then….Paula turns around and sells you what you’re gonna need once you actually have Diabetes. $Cha-ching$

“Just put a band-aid on it, y’all.”

“Life with Diabetes can be DELICIOUS and I want to tell y’all about it.
With Love.”

I don’t harbor any resentment against Paula. I don’t think this is some manufactured plot – but the whole thing is just wrong. She could be promoting diabetes prevention. She could grab another spot on Food Network cooking her trademark comfort food in a healthier, Diabetes-friendly way.    

But, Whatever. Totally Fine.

Well then. I’ve gone on FAR to long and really? There’s only so much a girl with an eating disorder can blather on about unhealthy and healthy food and obesity and whatnot before it becoming entirely laughable.
I’ll leave it at 50% laughable.

• What’s been on your mind lately?

  Also, you should read this book. (If you want). 

http://www.theendofovereatingbook.com/

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Sight, Sound, Soliloquy | God Spelled Backwards

Sight

See that iced tea? That stuff is legit.

Wow. My first foray into fridge photography. #youmightbeabloggerif

Someone help me. However, I gots to admit…I do enjoy peeping what’s creeping in other people’s refrigerators and I know I’m not alone. Heck, there are worse perversions to have.

Sound

This morning Hedda got me started with a little Bob Marley, which then led to some Lenny Kravitz and somehow I ended up here:

Ahh…the intricacies of my mind.

Soliloquy

On the way home from work I heard a story that touched my heart. Here’s the scoop:

An abandoned baby in Africa was found by a dog who proceeded to stand guard over it; refusing to leave the baby’s side in order to protect it. Nobody was looking for the baby. However, one distressed dog owner was looking for her dog.

The dog would faithfully return to his home each evening. When she didn’t show that night, the owner sent out a search party the next day.

The search part found the dog curled around the baby, who was then taken to a hospital and is doing okay.

Isn’t that the stuff right there? I mean…it is so amazing how the dog knew that vulnerable precious spirit needed protection. She abandoned her own needs and comfort and acted on pure instinctual love. . She was probably worried about her owner as well.

Just wow. God’s hands are ALL up in that.
I’ma go hug Zoe. 

PS- When I got home I googled the story and found a few articles and not a one gave the gender of the dog so I just picked she.
Here’s some linkage:

From Huffington Post

From the Christian Science Monitor

 

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How to be a Happy Pig at a BBQ Joint

I walked out the office door yesterday to this:

 

I immediately picked it up. Then I put it back down and snapped pictures to post on the internet in a ridiculous fashion.

 

We can learn a lot from a dancing, fiddle-playing pig.

That little dude looks happy to me—even in the midst of all that…um…barbeque. (I don’t judge).

Not really my kind of cuisine, but the Georgia Pig is sort of a legendary “dive” around these parts. I love it when business owners use their spaces to “scatter sunshine.”  #ilovemarketing

Any-

I’m-a wax poetic because this has been soaking up  my mental marinade overnight. One of the things that stood out to me when I read the card was this:

“Forget Self.”

Two words. So simple. So blunt.

It’s no secret that people with *ahem* issues (addictions, disorders, afflictions, depression..etc.) are some of the most selfish people on the planet. We can be the most loving, caring compassionate folks but still…selfish, selfish, selfish.
We can’t help it. When we’re caught up in our stuff, there is an impenetrable wall of “me,me,me” going on and little room for much else.

I mean, when we’re all caught up in our own shiz –think about it  — Basically we’re walking around with our heads up our own razzmatazz. <—mental image anyone? Because I’m not going there.

Here’s the thing about being self-absorbed; self-consumed: the YOU in you is absorbed. Consumed. Digested and turned to…well… you know. Basically- you lose yourself.

So….I guess.. we better

Forget Self before we Wreck Self.

That is all.

• Oh, um .. do you like BBQ? lol.

 

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Love the Ones You’re With

Anything I would write about tonight seems silly and ridiculous. Well, it’s all-the-time silly and ridiculous (and grammatically quirky) but you know what I mean.

Anything that is, except this:

Go hug someone and tell them you love them.

Nobody close by? Pick up the phone. Shoot the email (who coined that term?). Send the letter. Drop a love bomb on their facebook page. Tweet it if that’s your thing. Just do something.

Tell a loved one how you feel. 

My brother would often call me when we were both on our morning commutes. For the record, I am not a morning star and the conversations weren’t stellar. But you know what? Now I cherish every one.

So let’s do it. Now. Because we can.

And then do it again tomorrow. And repeat.

“You never know what will be coming down.”

-Jackson Browne.

Good song.

  

 

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Seven Schtuffs Starting with ‘S’ Sunday

Scary Sick

I don’t ever want to forget this past Memorial Day weekend. Not because I had a ridiculously fun time, but because I was ridiculously sick. Scary sick. Yeah, I came down with a serious case of “I have an Eating Disorder” and just…enough. I’m motivated. I can’t let sparkles and butterflies distract me anymore.

Saturday’s Sunset

 

That crane’s not always there. LOl

Sad

June is a heavy month for me…I start feeling it in May. June 5th is my brother’s birth date and he’s …you know, and I’m…still here. This awareness is compounded by my June Birthday. Perfect timing to reflect on all my….sigh.. accomplishments. My Mom’s B-day is also in June and she’s sad too and it’s all…well, it’s sad.

But, like the fear I felt when I got sick, I’m using my sad as motivation. It’s what Greg would have done.

 

Sushi

Sing-a-long, “S is for Sushi…that’s good enough for me.”

Swimming

I went swimming for the first time in a while and it felt really good. Like yoga, swimming puts more of ME in myself and I want this summer to gain strength and energy to do the things I love.

(Old Pic)

Synergy

Two magic cards that turn into happiness! Thanks Y’all!

Um … sorry I am not having a give-a-way. I’m selfish. So. It’s my birthday month.

Superior Numeral

Seven is the superior numeral. Sorry Six. But relax. That whole thing about seven eating nine? Fiction. 

• I’m going back to my commitment of blogging everyday – every day except when I don’t want to. Yes, I’m a litter-bug. Sorry interwebs.

• If you wanna leave a comment I dare you to leave just ONE word, no explanation, that starts with S. I will have fun trying to glean what you want to convey.

 

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