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Archive for November 5th, 2010

 

 

On November 4, 2009 my brother passed away unexpectedly.

One year later; today has been difficult.  I am flooded with penetrating sadness, memories, and that deep sense of loss unique to each of us who loved him.

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He is my hero. He is my Inspiration. He is my reason for carrying on this beautiful struggle to LIVE.

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I think about him everyday.

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And I have so much to write, so much to say….but today I just can’t fight my way through the fog.

Making this video helped.

 

 

 

I got the opportunity to speak at Greg’s service and what I wrote then was from my truest heart. I might let that speak for itself tonight.

 

I don’t believe my brother ever truly grasped how much I look up to him; and, as I’ve grown, developed a deep and profound respect for him. (He was a humble man).But…I know he knows now.

Greg is an inspiration to me and – our mother called it first – a real hero. And now, when I am doing life, and I feel lost…or afraid…or confused and weary…I still have him to look up to –and take a deep breath and keep moving.(And I better, too! He’s big brother, after all! I know he was a coach to many on the soccer field but he was kind of like my life coach…
When I was small and crying, he would come to my bedroom door and grab a small, pink porcelain bear he had made for me in art class. He’s kind-of wave it back and forth…like a white flag…and just stand there smiling. Within seconds we would both be laughing. I couldn’t resist.

Greg’s laughter –his spirit—it’s infectious. Right?

That image of him with the bear, smiling expectantly will be with me forever. I think we all have those images of Greg. And, in times of pain or when life might be getting the better of me (because I do struggle…I think we all do) —In those times, Greg’s spirit can help lift me up and make me smile. (And I better…he’s the big bro)
But I think he will be doing that for each and every one of us. We all loved Greg – and respected him.

He was a hard worker….ambitious and responsible. Greg handled his life very seriously –but—knew better than to ever take life too seriously. He made us smile a whole lot. With laughter and pride. And he’s gonna be able to keep us smiling.
He’ll have the biggest smile of us all.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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